Lubbock Left

Wow, this parody of the “Yes, We Can” video is simply hilarious:

Just had to share — pass it on!

Obama has had a very, very good weekend and the start of an excellent week. Not only did he win big in South Carolina, but he received a few big endorsements including Caroline Kennedy (JFK’s daughter) and Ted Kennedy, who has been deliberately neutral until now.

Tonight, however I found out that a voice I really try hard to hear has endorsed my candidate of choice: Randall Munroe, author of my favorite webcomic xkcd. His blog announcement is particularly eloquent:

I want, for once, someone I can vote for not because I dislike the other candidate, but because I’m proud of mine. Obama is the real thing.

Obama has shown a real commitment to open government. When putting together tech policy (to take an example close to home for xkcd) others might have gone to industry lobbyists. Obama went to Lawrence Lessig, founder of Creative Commons (under which xkcd is published) and longtime white knight in the struggle with a broken system over internet and copyright policy.

…

The Democratic party has a long, painful history of nominating unlikable, uncharismatic ‘default’ establishment candidates who are eventually swatted aside by the voters. Nominating Clinton would be continuing that tradition at the very time when we have a chance to do so much better. Let’s not let that chance slip by.

I want someone who can lead the country. When people grow cynical and detached from government, or blinded by partisanship, evil runs amok. Obama represents an honest shot at making our government something we can be proud of. I’m tired of throwing things at CNN. I’m tired of feeling depressed when I read speeches by the founding fathers. I want Jon Stewart to smile again. For a brief moment, next Tuesday, we’ll have a shot at finally getting things right. Please help.

Right on, Randall.

As a bonus, here’s a sample of xkcd that we have taped up on the wall at the office:

Happy Solstice Everyone

In what could produce ripples through the national educational system, voters in Maine have ousted over 2,000 years of educational doctrine. In a vote of no-confidence, locals have voted out the Druid majority from local school boards. In an overwhelming vote, the communities of Samhain and Cuithe have decided that the time has come to end the Druidian stronghold over their communities.

These communities as well as others scattered across the northeastern seaboard have seen a rapid decrease in Druidian representation. Starting with the defeat of 237 time elected mayor Gaelen the Round of Bath, the Druidian influence has taken a dramatic downturn. “We were simply looking for a different, more enlightened approach to education” said Pierre DeMarco, head of the Samhain Parent Teacher Association.

Under the Druidian school system, students were forced to learn topics like metallurgy, herpetology, stonemasonry and astrology. Senior Douglas Young believed the Druid curriculum was a valuable addition to his core classes. “I don’t see what the big deal is. It’s not like we killed dogs or anything.” The use of canines for incantations was replaced by felines in the late 1720’s.

The news could not have come at a worse time for the Druid community. “We’re all pretty tired from the Solstice Ceremony and concert and then we get this news. Everyone is a bit disoriented by these turn of events”, said Nigel Tufnel, founder of the band Spinal Tap and Northern 35th Level Druid. When asked about the future for the Druids in Maine education, Tufnel added, “We’ll just have to see how the bones fall but we are not ruling out litigation.”

Freda over at A Liberal Lubbockian wrote a pretty hilarious poem yesterday. Here’s the first bit:

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the White House
no creature was stirring, not even some louse.

The Congress was nestled all snug in their beds
while visions of pages danced in their heads.

I promise you the whole thing is even more hilarious!

Warning: More Satire from Helmut

A sudden spark in hostilities as thrown the world into conflict this week. A Declaration of War was delivered to St. Nicholas by the Foreign Minister of Nunavut laying out the intentions of several hostile Inuet tribes to war against Christmas. Inuet tribes are accusing the jolly elf of over aggressive border movements by reindeer in the area. It is unknown whether or not these movements are tantamount to war by the international community but violence has erupted along a 2,000 mile border between the state of Nunavut and the North Pole.

St. Nicholas, Prime Minister of the North Pole has asked for the United Nations to send in peace keeping forces to the region but it is doubtful that the Security Council will make a decision before the the New Year. Most ambassadors have been implicated in a scandal involving the promises to be good and bribing of cookies and milk for presents from Santa. With the UN in an uneasy situation and most ambassadors already out of New York for the Christmas holiday, it is unlikely they will be able to return before the upcoming deadline for hostilities.

The United States is debating the possibility of unilaterally intervening in the conflict. Members of the Senate Committee on Foreign Relations met in a closed door meeting on Tuesday to discuss it’s options. Ranking members were rumored to be discussing the use US veterans from the Iraqi war to save Christmas. With continued pressure mounting by business leaders and religious interests in certain swing states, it is likely that a joint resolution to use military force will be announced by the end of the week.

Disclaimer: From time to time I enjoy writing from a more whimsical perspective. The following is for your entertainment. In no way is this an attack on Microsoft.

The latest salvo has been fired in the culture wars, this time by James Dobson. The founder and chairman of the board for Focus on the Family has announced the latest initiative set forth by his Christian based organization. On his daily radio talk show, Dobson encouraged his listeners to boycott the letter “X” until the American public “fully appreciates the power of the Christian community.”

The controversy surrounds the unwillingness by Microsoft the replace the “X” on it’s popular video game console Xbox with what Dobson believes should be “Christ”. Dobson stated on his nationally syndicated radio program that, “everyone knows this is just another attack on the Christians of this land. If Microsoft will not put Christ back in Xbox, then we will have to take the X away from them!”

The plan calls for a national referendum on replacing the letter “X” with the word “Christ” with a potential Constitutional Amendment on the horizon. “Unless the good Christians of this land stand up for their rights, they will eventually erode away. We must take our stand on this issue now before the liberals destroy any more of our way of life” Dobson concluded on Thursday.

An expansion on the basic plan will call for the boycott of “eXtra” gum and “EXTRA”, the entertainment TV program. Some are concerned with what this will mean in the long run. “When my kids wander into a “Christ, Christ, Christ” video store, they may be exposed to material that is less that Godly” stated Bill Parrish, head of Children First, a child advocacy program at the University of Notre Dame.

Gave me a chuckle, which is always nice on a Monday morning.

From the “not ashamed to pass on funny e-mail” department:

Bush Library

There’s a show on C-SPAN about presidential libraries. Here’re what the draft plans for the George W. Bush Library now call for:

The Alberto Gonzales Room - Where you can’t remember any of the exhibits.

The Hurricane Katrina Room - It’s still under construction.

The Texas Air National Guard Room - Where you don’t have to even show up.

The Walter Reed Hospital Room - Where they don’t let you in.

The Guantanamo Bay Room - Where they don’t let you out.

The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room - Nobody has been able to find it.

The War in Iraq Room - After you complete your first tour, they can force you to go back for your second and third and fourth and fifth tours.

The K-Street Project Gift Shop - Where you can buy an election, or, if no one cares, steal one.

The Men’s Room - Where you could meet a Republican Senator (or two).

To be fair, the President has done some good things, and so the museum will have an electron microscope to help you locate them.

When asked, President Bush said that he didn’t care so much about the individual exhibits as long as his museum was better than his father’s.

There’s lots to make you stop and scratch your head in the city that brings you thunderstorms in a clear sky.

Spotted this weekend:

• Overflowing church parking lots on Sunday morning
• The marquee on a local record store changed to read “USED COED VAGINAS: $4″

Heard on a local talk radio call-in show this weekend:

• Complaints about increased police presence at Texas Tech football games
• Having a laugh at the “Don’t tase me, bro!” University of Florida incident

I’ve been seeing a lot of Ron Paul signs up around town as well. I guess that contrasts with the political inactivity in this area from every other presidential primary candidate.

Lubbock Democracy for America, taking a turn for the irreverent, is screening Mike Judge’s under-appreciated crude satire “Idiocracy” this Wednesday at Mahon. From the email:

Wednesday, 09/26 at 07:00 PM
Mahon Library
1306 9th St
Lubbock, TX 79401

Full details are on the event page.